Myself as an example I am quite nice to others because I know how it is to be stepped on... but that doesn't reflect how I feel about myself because I was taught that I'm no good, I was a scapegoat. I mean wouldn't it mean I am good to myself? I'm not. I'm awful to myself but only after years and years of having negative messages from literally everyone around me growing up. I mean I'm capable of feeling good until someone comes along and acts like I should be hanging my head in shame over my life, my appearance or my (past)job and like I have some nerve being happy.
I'm sorry if I hijacked this thread I will return to observing.