So much irony in this thread
It took me a while to get it too. Timmy, I congratulate you on your sober time and if you are sober and happy that's all that matters.
I agree with your statement that there are many arm folders in AA. The same is true with life in general. I didn't let that keep me from working the steps and in turn it actually forced me to investigate why I feel that way about them.
I've spent time on and off over the years paying good money for counseling. I've yet to think back and find anything that is equal to what the steps have done for me. Will it do the same for everyone? Not my place to say.
When I got over my sense of needing to control everything and instead focused on what my issues are I stopped the grinding and fighting. Instead of being concerned about others actions I learned to look inward. I can't change or fix other people. I can only work on me. What is my lot in life? The earth does not revolve around me. Oddly enough I used to accuse others of being that way. Nope, it's all me and my perception of them. If that's who they are it's their issue, not mine.
Do I still get irritated or disappointed? Sure. I'm human. I just have a far better way of dealing with those feelings now.
It's disheartening when I see a post like yours followed up with an I knew it so I'm shying away too. There is so much that's good in the program and so many meetings available. You'll find the arm folders everywhere you go but let them be them and don't let it ruin the goodness for you.