don't mind at all, Jess.
i quit drinking in a moment of clarity, after numerous uncountable commitments, decisions and promises to never drink again ended up useless to me.
i grabbed that moment and ran with it. not drinking was easy after that, and continues to be easy.
after a couple of years of that and initially everything improving, though, i found myself in the place some call 'irritable, restless and discontent'.
i wrote about it here just yesterday:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...4-post483.html
i saw many many people return to drinking and get stuck there again, regardless of BP or other ways. i started to understand that the solution i needed involved something much different than just not drinking. and that if i didn't find it/get on with pursuing it, there was no reason to believe that in three more years or fourteen more years i might not suddely grab a drink, seemingly out of the blue. others did, and i had done it in the past.
i decided the AA route was put together by people like me for people like me, and i took it.
i'm very happy to hear you'll be back at work, Jess.
and hoping you'll find the way to get to that balance you were speaking of.