Originally Posted by
Trees39 
Dee posted this line as part of his response to someone..
I was prepared to change everything to stay sober
That's the crux eh? I'm still not convinced I'm 'prepared to change everything'. If I'm honest with myself I've got a side that's prepared to gamble.
Im frightened of that. How frightened ... I'm not sure.
Has anyone developed risky behaviour since becoming sober? Or know what I'm mean? Is being risky part of the addiction?
I feel I'm in a real battle with myself these days. Hopefully it's because I'm searching and not giving in.
I pushed the envelope to the extreme Trees. It's not something I recommend.
It's not like I bounced back unscathed. I had several mini strokes and although I'm doing great, things physically are never going to be like they used to be.
I had such a fear of changing my life - but I hated the life I was in. I just didn't want a worse one.
Honestly, read a few threads on any given day and you'll see no one here left a drinking life for a sober one that was worse
It's not easy for a while - but that transition period passes.
Sober life at any point was never a bad as the cross country run under fire that my drinking life was at the end though
There's really two choices - change or die. You can change now and lose a little or change late and lose a lot - money career, loved ones, health perhaps even life if you're unlucky....
Even for a risk tasker or gambler, the odds on change later without any kind of loss...they're pretty crook.
The choice is yours Trees.
D