Regarding relapse - I absolutely do not trust myself, and that is why I keep bouncing things off you guys here. I mean, I have successfully said "no thanks" several times to a drink - and that's good - but it only takes that one time.
These are positive external changes but stressful all the same - and there is this low level feeling of a strange boredom and irritability. Maybe I have no idea how to feel content with "normal".