I have mixed thoughts on this- when I read the first sentence, I thought yep! So true. Then I started thinking about it more as I read others' posts.
There was a fine line for me- I didn't actively think about suicide (ie, planning) but I definitely toyed with the idea of "just being dead." I once asked my dr if she thought I was trying to kill myself- she said, no, but my behaviors were taking me down that road. I don't think I ever would have done it- a big reason being I believe I would go to hell- but I do think I reached a point where I might've been relieved, right before I died, that it was over even with my contributing to it if not actively causing my death.
But the bottom line is- sober me can't imagine taking my own life. No matter what happens in it now. And that is the best news. I don't have to worry about this question anymore.