This is kind of typical alcoholic behaviour and thinking to be honest. I carried the same kind of resentments and anxieties around with me from childhood and early teens. It was like I'd stopped developing emotionally when I first started drinking to deal with stuff instead of finding more healthy ways. Recovery through AA and the 12-step program really helped. Yes, it's insane thinking. No, it's not rational, but alcoholics have a very distorted perspective of the world.
So. The good news is that there are ways she can address these issues if she wants to get sober and work on recovery.
The bad news is that she's got to want that herself before its possible, and even then it takes acceptance and willingness, and commitment.