Originally Posted by
Hendrix 
When you just want to stop being nice, when you want to curl into a ball and hide from the world, when you can't give any more, when you need some introverted "me" time, when the rest of the world can go and do one, and you don't drink anymore yet the rest of your world does, and you really want to join them.....just to switch off - for one night?
One night?
You relapsed long to long ago. And not just for one night. So thinking you can "switch it off" for just one night is mostly fantasy. Why do you feel this way? Because the AV is relentless and it worked last time.
I like the advice to go to bed. Let the world spin while you sleep.