OMG, your post was like reading my life story. I am also an older Mom. I had my Daughter when I was 44 she is now 8 and I also have a love/hate relationship with Merlot. I have not stopped yet but, will be when we get back from vacation next week. Maybe, we can help each other kick Merlot out of our lifes together. Oh, yeah. I also gained LOTS of weight 30+ pounds plus a puffy face, swollen eyes....it's just not worth it. Good luck to you. Your Son is going to be so proud of you. Way to go.