I like the commitment in your post.
Originally Posted by
Shebasuki96 at the end of the day it was my choice.
Yup. That's a harsh realization, but a necessary one.
Don't be surprised if your doctor isn't very helpful. They mean well, but very few are trained to treat the breathtakingly bad decision making that comes with addiction. I have found others who have suffered / recovered and those who specialize in it to be much more helpful.
Best of Luck on Your Journey.