Originally Posted by
Forourgirls 
I agree but some are just bad people-has nothing to do with alcoholism. It has more to do with arrogabce and entitlement to treat a wife like property and degrade her...that is abuse.
That is very true.
It is important to remember that not every alcohol abuser also abuses their partner. There are "happy drunks", but I think we hear less about them because their behaviour is less damaging to their family than that of the "angry / belligerent / abusive drunk".
It seems like it is the combination of arrogance, a sense of superiority, and entitlement that is expressed even more with the disinhibiting aspects of alcohol.
I saw many examples of arrogance, acting as if they were above other people, entitlement, a lack of normal boundaries and a lack of empathy in my ex and various members of my ex's family of origin (FOO).
So in her extremes of alcohol "enhanced" arrogance, sense of superiority, and entitlement, even if you removed the alcohol, there is a still a link in her attitudes to her FOO.
So it felt like a case of alcohol simply bringing out the worst parts of her attitude and personality, and multiplying them by 10.