hard forming friendships in AA
Does anyone have this problem?
I'm sure a lot of it is because I'm 38 years old and a guy, but in total I've done AA for about 2 years, in NYC. I feel like the comradery angle is talked up, but when you get down to it, it's like the men there don't know how to or don't wish to actually be friends with me beyond the I 'help you thereby help myself' variety.
I know what this must sound like, but I'm really not clingy. Nor do I care all that much. After a while though it just seems odd. I just think that in any environment that you devote so much time to, there should some friendships formed, some hint of that.
I've done a fair amount. Sometimes I can draw people out, but then they never reciprocate. Honestly, it sort of reminds me of a bar scene, but worse in this respect. Like people who don't quite get it. I still like it, don't get me wrong. And I am very open to the possibility that I don't get it, that there is something off about me. but now in any event I take the comradery aspect with a grain of salt. I have a friendly nature, but now I remind myself that trying to create these ties is not something I should focus on in AA.