Originally Posted by
Wastinglife 
You don't have to be a mean drunk to be an alcoholic. In fact, many alcoholics are very good at maintaining a pleasant demeanour and give no outward signs of intoxication. You mentioned that he suffers depression and and anxiety. When I was a daily drinker, I was miserable all the time too. Alcohol can really negatively affect one's mental health. It changes the brain.
Your husband sounds like he is in denial. Alcoholism is progressive so expect things to get worse
My question is...can it progress this slowly, as in no visible change over the course of decades?? He seems never to outwardly get worse. And he's been a drinker for life.
I know it inevitably worsens, whether it affects mood, demeanor, or health, but is it inevitable that someone gets mean? I suppose they could actually maintain a "normal" demeanor for decades, and potentially succumb to the disease before they ever get mean, right?