Yes I can't deal with it well at all. I can't do much aside from crying and feeling impotent. I miss the kind of waking sleep that alcohol gave me. The edges are so hard right now. Really hurting. On top of the many things I can't help people with right now, the outside world seems so harsh and hateful. Just one or two people are able to do so much harm. I think of the loved ones and families grieving. It just multiplies and grows. And the ignorance of the people who won't do anything. Is killing me.