Oh Rocky, I totally get where you are coming from. A lot of what you say is absolutely right, but I also think that it's more complicated than all of that. I do believe my AH (short for Alcoholic Husband...as opposed to an AW (alcoholic wife)) loved me. I don't think he loved me the way I deserved to be loved, and I believe his disease makes it impossible to behave in a way that is truly respectful of me.
I also believe (and know) that many recovering alcoholics who are in true recovery don't fit into your statement in #5. There are MANY alcoholics in recovery who have learned (and continue to learn) how to take responsibility for their actions in the past and the present.
I agree whole-heartedly that the best thing someone can do is to stay far, far away from an ACTIVE addict. But I also don't think it's fair to demonize those people, or to paint RECOVERING/sober addicts with the same brush.
I know it has been a grueling stretch for you, and your AW is treating you terribly. I hope that, with time, your anger and resentment will fade.
