You know, I have actually given something here on SR. Like I said, it can't happen over night. As I have said in the past, getting these tests done is a 1st step for me and does not come easily. It can be easily dismissed if you haven't been through such a situation. My plan was: Get sober- done. Get tested- in process.
Then, try and find out who I really am, one huge obstacle being a very abusive upbringing and another being this learning disorder. I am at my own pace.
There is no simple, quick answer for me. I will have more answers after tests. It takes time, this unchosen path of mine. I already put my plan in to action and it is no easy feat- I already did a thing that many who have more fortune and family cannot or will not do- I achieved freedom from not one but two very addictive substances. The rest is a proceed with caution as it is mentally and emotionally very icy territory. I have to take care with it.