I let people treat me very, very poorly. Partially because I felt I deserved it, because in my mind I was a terrible person with this terrible problem. Partially because I would use the alcohol to numb me out just enough that I could stand it. And finally partially because drinking put me in such a state of dumb inertia that I couldn't sort out how to get out of these situations once I was in them.
I think I will protect myself better in the future. I hope you are taking care of yourself.