Yeah, I agree with BKA - sometimes, it scares one partner to see the other one getting better. When I started getting better, my xabfs emotional swings got way, way worse.
Sometimes people want to leave and want someone or something to blame it on. Either way - you are probably in a much better environment to do that life changing work on yourself. I know it is painful, but that can be a very good motivator sometimes. Take care (((Expanding)))