Those numbers people gave you are for just those moments. How did they know you'd have those moments??? Because they've been there and know what it's like. So, lesson learned. Next time, don't just look at the numbers, CALL them. Tell someone how you're feeling and let them help you. That's the power of the fellowship. When I don't feel like I have the necessary power, I reach out to my higher power, and to other AAers who will lend me some of their strength, hope and wisdom. Often as I'm talking my rubbish out of my head, the insanity of it hits me in the face, and I know from listening to myself where my thinking is skewed. Sometimes I don't recognise it myself, but they do and can offer me a different perspective,. But whatever, I always feel better and stronger after talking with someone from the fellowship.
You say your wife triggers you to drink. You know, i used to think all kinds of things triggered me to drink. But then I realised that the problem wasn't those things at all. It was me. I had, somewhere along the line, decided that alcohol was the solution to the problem of me feeling bad (fearful, anxious, rejected, resentful, jealous, angry, guilty or whatever). So, whenever something made me feel bad I wanted to drink. And the problem never went away. Often I behaved badly because I'd drunk and made things even worse than they already were.
What I've learned through AA is how to accept life on life's terms. Those people I can't change, the things I can't have, the person I am not, the world injustices that go on. When I was drinking I didn't realise how much futile anger I carried around. I was one little walking tantrum to be honest. Expecting everything to resolve around me. Now I know to treat wishful thinking, willfulness and self pity with utmost caution.
Why not give pour away any alcohol you still have in the house and call one of those numbers?