IF he has truly taken Steps 1-8, honestly and thoroughly, then he understands the INTENT of Step 9:
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others
which means the amendee has the right to decline. and that is perfectly ok, and exactly as it should be. it is the willingness to make amends that counts.
to clarify what he "may" have meant about relapsing. if one does not take the steps seriously to build a strong foundation in recovery, then relapse is that much more possible. BUT that does NOT mean that if he does NOT makes amends to YOU he will surely relapse.
so if you aren't interested, then you are in no way obligated or responsible for what happens next TO HIM. that you had him cut off from so many forms of contact but he still found a way thru is disturbing. he obviously didn't get the hint, eh?