Katheo.....I wonder if the "anxious and sick" feeling that you are having are from these possible two sources:
1. Fear of him disagreeing with you----like.....needing him to agree with you about the validity of your leaving and agreeing with you about the reasons.....
2. Fear of the future without him.....afraid that it will be too painful for you to cope with.....(there is a list, about a mile long, that people are often afraid of).....
Now, I am just guessing, here.....
dandylion