Wife, I'm very sorry if I gave that impression. I don't recall saying anything like that, though. Believe me, to say anything to him about his clothes or lack of bathing would just be asking for a fight. I spent enough years crying, begging, yadda yadda yadda. I don't do anything like that anymore. As I mentioned somewhere in this thread, I do occasionally clean his dentures for him - but only because looking at the cup that's been sitting there for a week or more makes me gag! lol Entirely self preservation there! lol
Thanks, Wisconsin for the clarification. I know it *could* still be depression related. My whole issue is that something has changed - and continues to change, and the medical staff hasn't taken my concerns seriously. *shrug* What else can a person do though?
Thank you so much for your concern, Lady. I too get concerned about the kids. Over the years, they have done some counseling at various different times and, right now, they seem pretty open to talking to me most of the time. I have 4 teenagers and we spend a lot of late nights discussing all those important things that just can't be discussed before 11 PM! lol Right now, I couldn't be prouder or more pleased with the way they are turning out. Our eldest is about to leave for graduate school in fall. The next 3 all have part time jobs and it's so fun watching them grow into young adulthood. We also have a competitive gymnast, and then the two youngest who are 7 & 8, and just enjoy driving everyone else crazy!
Truly, I am very, very blessed. I have wonderful friends, we are all very active in our church, the kids have good friends and stay busy. It hasn't been an easy life - virtually raising 7 kids on my own - but it's a good life and I'm very content in it. It would be easy to be bitter, but honestly, I don't have the time or mental energy to spend on it! I am DONE crying and wishing for things to change or be different. I enjoy life and spend my precious energy doing things with people who appreciate me. BUT, I do, and will always, care for him because he is my husband. I have firm lines drawn in several places - no physical abuse, and he gets no money (when he is not stressed or feeling argumentative he is in agreement with this). Despite whatever his poor mind is telling him, I am and always will be his best cheerleader. I can't control what he says to others or how he perceives things. I can only control me and how I respond to him, and I choose "love," - not romantic, gushy love - real love - the kind that says, I'm here for you no matter what because it's the right thing to do; the kind that is hard work; the kind that doesn't ask for anything in return, demand, or present ultimatums. I know for a fact, as hard as it's been, I am a better person for it and I am grateful. I would not be the person I am today but for the difficulties I've been through, and, well, I kind of like who I've turned out to be so far!
I am far, far, FAR from perfect and I give myself plenty of opportunities to learn from mistakes, but each day is a new one!
God bless, one and all, Jen