Originally Posted by
ndlc08 
Every time he does it it's like a slap in the face to me and my mom, yet if I openly say anything everyone acts like I'm the *******.
Welcome, and I am so very sorry for what brings you here.
You've received a lot of great support and feedback, and I echo what everyone else has said. I wanted to add one thing, though, and it's in response to your statement above. Your father does not drink AT you or your mom. He doesn't do it with the intention or purpose of hurting you guys. In fact, his drinking is not about you guys at all. He is an alcoholic, and he is doing what alcoholics do. That was a very difficult concept for me to understand as I was learning about alcoholism.
Like you, my STBXAH is in an environment where virtually every body abuses drugs or alcohol. It's related to his job/career, not his culture, but the end result is the same. He is surrounded by it all the time, and that can make it even more difficult to quit and seek recovery. However, my STBXAH did have several solid years or recovery and sobriety, even amidst that environment. The responsibility for your father's drinking rests with your father, and your father alone. If he wants to get sober and seek recovery, he will find a way to do it regardless of cultural or environmental factors.
Just keep the focus on yourself. Your father will drink, or he won't. The question is, what are YOU going to do?