I developed a pretty severe anxiety disorder during the last two years of living with my AXH. My doctor prescribed meds, which I didn't like taking but I did for it helped with the physical symptoms of the panic attacks which had become completely debilitating. (It's kind of impossible to function when one can not breathe...)
Aside from the potential for the pills to become addictive, they had other bothersome side effects that I found REALLY uncomfortable to live with. However it was still better then multiple panic attacks daily.
After a while I need a higher dosage as the effectiveness of the drug was wearing off as I developed a tolerance to the prescription. This scared the HECK out of me. I talked to my doctor who was unconcerned about it because he didn't feel I had an "addictive personality"...
I talked to my (X)AH husband about it and he was unconcerned too. As a matter of fact he suggested I just take more.. or get different meds...that he wasn't going to change his behavior so I had best find a medication to cope with the hell MY life had because because of his addiction.
This was one of the final straws in my deciding to separate. Anyone that thinks I have to medicate myself so they can continue to ruin their own health and mine right along with it, was no longer some one I could share my life with.
Leaving a 26yr relationship(22 married) was the hardest more painful thing I have ever had to do. But since THE DAY I left, I have not had to take a single tranquilizer. I don't suffer from anxiety or have nightmares and I am healing from the pain of divorce, slowly but surely.
Best of luck to you Katetheo. It's never easy loving or leaving an alcoholic. *hugs*