^ spot on. My exs mask is his nice side "play" as well. I didn't get to witness his core issues and demons until we were narried-but they were there all along. I wish I would have left that first year-after the first demon incident. Your guy sounds a lot like mine-alcoholism, porn, women issues, FOO issues, totally insecure, codependent. Those are his to fix. You won't have a good relationship ( or even decent) until he does-and no woman will fix his deep issues. I never say this either, but RUN!!
Until your guy gets massive help I would not reconsider anything-you must protect yourself (and your health) from his choices.