I finally talked to my ex over the phone. He asked me to call him so I did. Its been nearly 4 months since I had seen him, with little communication. We do have a child together.
He sounded so happy and healthy. He said he traded alcohol for pot. When we lived together, he was already smoking so that was helping but, he would always relapse. He said hes been sober since we split and that the only thing that stops him from drinking is smoking.
We talked a little, laughed a lot. I miss him so much. For a second I thought about meeting him. What is it that I think is going to happen? I keep thinking he can be the person I love, the person that my daughter needs. But I know that he hasnt grown up yet. I still love him. Its so hard. I just need to drill it into my head.
