Need Change
I don't know what happened last night but I decided to consume alcohol and was confident up to that point that I wouldn't. I even put my husband on hold to go out and buy the booze I originally poured out.
It wasn't much but that is not the freaking point. I haven't been to work now in over a week. I'm starting to think my job is my trigger.
I've tried contacting some therapists but they are all busy and unable to take on another client. I'm starting to get discouraged.
I'm not trying to make this a whiny post but I am so disappointed in myself. It's hard not to beat myself up and it is so easy to continue to isolate as I have no friends or family. They are all alcohol/drug friends.
I want to get out of this bed but it is so hard. I know it's not impossible I just won't do it.