At a loss
As I write this, I am literally at a loss on where to go from here. When wife left for rehab, I was finished with our marriage, simply because of past alcoholism and addiction and it was her second go round with rehab, and she had went to the hospital telling them she wanted to end her life. There's no easy way to say this, but while she was at rehab, I had an affair, to which I told her when she got home and we were working through it. She didn't want me to leave and we even starred talking about planning trips for the family.
But last night she decided to get a half pint of vodka and drink it, got drunk, and told me the reason was because I was through since I had the affair.
I told her I was through when she left for rehab, but wanted to work on our marriage and we had both done bad things; though it didn't absolve what I did, simply because she had her addictive past, we were moving forward, so I thought.
I realize I messed up and nothing I can say can change what I did. I am at a loss of what to do.