I'm sorry to hear you were feeling so awful today. I don't want to reply by just telling you to stop, or to just put the beer down because I know first hand it's not that easy. But I can say that if you can just get through the first few days it does get easier, at least it did for me. I am on day seven and every day gets better.
Today is a rough one for me as I realized I'm going to be in a particularly tough situation next weekend but I'm going to fight tooth and nail to get through it. I understand what you mean about the pain and anxiety. Like yourself,and probably everyone here, I always felt better after I drank a few. I forgot my pain, my stress etc. At least I thought I did.
In seven days I have learned I was so wrong. I can't begin to tell you all the positive changes I've seen already. I've been more productive, I'm not as short tempered, I feel better physically, my mental clarity is better. All the things that I thought I needed alcohol to fix, are going away on there own because I'm not drinking.
You are stronger then this, you can do this!