hopeful4

So, as most of you know, it's in my divorce decree that my X cannot drink around my children. This has happened many times, and I have had to go pick up my youngest from his house on several occasions. My eldest no longer goes.

This is so unfair, as life mostly is. I am forced on his weekends to stay around and be on call to be able to be there in the blink of an eye. I have developed bad habits into just sitting at home and waiting around....just in case. I have isolated myself from friends.

So...that being said, I was talking to someone this week who told me I have been having such a hard time and that I have friends who love me and that I should reach out to them. So I did (thank God for girlfriends who understand). We are going out tomorrow night. I was also invited to an event Saturday during the day that I would really like to attend, but it would be 2.5 hours away.

So..that being said, I am asking for an opinion on if I should go or not. My X has been pretty decent to my child of late when she is there. Doing things w/her and redid her room, etc. He has been off all this week and starts a new job on Monday. I am sure he has drank all week. It is my thought that he will hopefully stay dry for the weekend b/c my child will be there and he starts this job that he is extremely excited about on Monday.

So.....should I stay or should I go???? It makes me sick to have to put so much though into all of this, but this is my life for now, until my child is older. My child is 10.5 years old for those who would want to know that.