Liveitwell

So I had a stomach bug yesterday and spent the morning on the couch before getting into work. I stumbled upon the dr Phil show and I could swear it was my ex sitting there. Dr Phil just leveled the guy-calling him immature, narcissistic, abusive, a liar and a cheat with little empathy and all of it stemming from his lack of a good role model as a dad. One thing that stuck out to me....as this guy is responding he's making little jokes....covering stuff with humor. Dr Phil called him on it and told him all the things you're trying to joke about are the real issues in you. I recalled one of my exs infamous quotes during our marriage and even before. He would joke about " men are superior , women are inferior". I used to crack up (like ten years ago). But I witnessed that attitude come full and center for the first time a few weeks after we got married during a drubken tirade. And throughout the years his drubken tirades got more and more and closer together and I realized that was his true self....the night I called the police on him he had been using me as his verbal punching bag telling me how I didn't make enough money (thank God I didn't choose to stay at home bc then I really would have been worthless in his mind by making no money!!), that I was worthless and wouldn't amount to anything without my dad's money and that I should be thanking him endlessly bc he paid for our families health insurance for years while I did nothing. A week or so prior to that fateful night I had gotten home from a long day at work and gymnastics and I came home to drunk husband that screamed at me cursing me out telling me "God, you can't do ******* anything....you can't do one GD thing I ask you to do....." Bc I forgot to pick up a light bulb on the way home. Who he truly was and is shined more brightly than his lying words. I was told constantly I was a p*ssy and weak and over sensitive after being abused. About a year or so prio to that there was an issue with his cousin and his wife-my drunk husband went to their house and physically cornered his wife - she felt scared and wished her husband had been there with her and I told her I understood-welcome to my life. He got back home and I told him how awful that was to do to her and he called her a p*ssy, too. And then called his cousin a p*ssy bc he wasn't a man (according to my husband). Man, in his mind, literally everyone is a p*ssy-especially women that have feelings.

Talk about entitlement and women issues. He hadn't been joking-he really felt that way.....he felt superior and therefore I was ok to abuse.

Any of y'all deal with this, too? The off handed jokes that you realized were not jokes at all?

Anyway , just got me thinking that another time actions were not at all aligned with words.