100 Days
As I woke up this morning, the gout pain in my foot had improved overnight. Besides getting a good nights sleep, my body was busy repairing and processing all the functions of the day, preparing me to face yet another day of sobriety.
I also woke up feelng pretty good this morning.....before 100 days ago, I would often wake up to a nightmare....Not really sleeping that well to begin with, I wasn't ready to face the day, or really get out of bed for that matter.....But the thing that surprises me is the fact that I've forgotten what it was like to wake up in the morning feeling very normal....Normal, as far as not having to think about how well my heart is beating.....or how good my lungs are functioning....or how sick to my stomach I've become during the night......Ive forgotten how good it feels to wake up and not have to run to the toilet because the nausea was so bad I dry heaved on my knees for a few minutes....Ive forgotten how good it feels not having palpitations and anxiety so bad I couldn't decide whether to go to work or the ER!
Yes, this morning was a triump. A day, not just 100 days sober, but feeling a childlike normalcy that surpasses all understanding. I'm sure most of you can remember what it was like as a kid waking up on a Saturday morning excited about rushing out of bed, in anticipation of all the fun kid stuff you were gonna be doing that day. I sure did! Well I almost felt that way this morning when I woke up.....It's been years since I was this excited abiut it being a Friday! Friday, last day of the work week for me.....anticipation of a great weekend although it is forecast to rain the whole time! Rain? Seriously? So why am I still excited?
Only sobriety on that level is the phenomenon I can't really explain....I've always been fond of thunderstorms, no matter how I felt, but it was magnified by the fact that this day was different......This day I'm 100 days sober....
I know there won't always be days this good, but at least I'm no longer kidding myself in thinking that I need to drink to feel good. As long as I remain sober, and maintain good health......I know there will be good and bad days. Way more good than bad, for sure.
Thank you all for your support.....Looking forward to many more days, weeks, months, and years of sobriety.
Intro