You don't have to forgive him today-one day you'll get there. I realized over time that my anger was not serving any purpose but to keep me held back-and truly felt awful for my ex as his burdens and cross to bear are growing by the day. I do forgive him for what he's done and what he has yet to do. It's helped me move on to peace for me and my girls. Forgiving myself, that's the tougher one (I wrote about this recently). You'll get there....
Peace to you, friend.