Hey everyone,
Day 18 for me. Just like always, I am not having too many troubles, but I have now learned from my past that I always END UP getting myself back INTO trouble. I am definitely NOT on a pink cloud, I just think my form of alcoholism is more of the binge-type, which can be very, very tricky in many ways. What I have learned however, is that I can never, ever again pick up that FIRST drink. If I had not done that when I first started here in earnest, I'd be 4 years sober now. So for me I am always going to have to be on the ball and never let my guard down. It is just very tricky because when I don't drink I don't crave. But of course, that never lasts too long, and I get that ridiculous notion that I can drink normally again. I don't want to drink "normally" again. I can't, first of all. I won't second of all. This I have learned.....
I officially started my one week vacation today. I have read many people mention St. Patrick's Day and I am glad that I stopped celebrating that holiday years ago. Oh the St. Patrick's day binges and hangovers. Awful.
For what it is worth, I have definitely noticed a lot of changes in 18 days, especially all of the days from about 11 on, or a week ago. I am sleeping better, I'm more calm, my mind is not racing, and I'm not counting the hours. For me the first week is make or break. A week is a LONG time in early sobriety.
I hope everyone has a safe and happy holiday if you do celebrate St. Patrick's Day. I am with Jobei, good food always helps me not to drink. I am one of those drinkers who can't eat and drink at the same time. Right when I eat my desire for alcohol goes away. So for now I am making healthy choices and if I want a cheat food, I let myself have it. But I have lost 20 pounds in the past 3 months from dedicated good-eating, and I do not want to gain it back because I definitely feel better from the weight loss. 20 pounds is a lot of extra weight to carry around and I have quite a bit more. I have been exercising a lot but I think I finally am ready to safely kick it up a notch.
Have a great sober day to you all!
Lee