Day 27. 10:18 am.
I woke up at around 9 today, feeling pretty good. Had some restless dreams, but just regular restless dreams like we all get. I am continue being lazy a bit longer though. Yesterday I took a "lazy-day" because I had been too active and needed some rest. Today I feel like I could use some more rest. The only thing different I will do today is that I *will* shower.
I had a cool experience this morning when I just woke up. I got triggered and thought about drinking, but my response was very different. You know how, when you drank, you would have moments where you just knew you were going to drink? This time it was in reverse.
The fact that I can't buy beer because my brother has my wallet hadn't occurred to me yet in my morning drowsiness.
I felt the cravings, saw what I was imagining (me getting beer and drinking), but underneath it all I had a good feeling that made me know I WASN'T going to do it.
I was even able to joke about it to myself. Jokingly I though: "DRINK!!! PARTY!!! YEAH!!!". Made me laugh.
Then something really cool happened. Right after I though, in a pretty neutral manner: "No." At the same time, I felt the craving and need leave me. It wasn't like a craving you have to wait out. It was like they actually left me.
Then I realized that I need to be careful. Because that means I need to be on guard at least as much as I have been. It's not smart to assume that they have left me permanently.
Which is where my body came in. My body has been helping me so far by triggering nausea when I'm near the alcohol isle.
Well, when I drank, I would often have stomach pain. Like a sharp object was pierced into my stomach. That's completely gone btw.
Funny thing is, I started to feel the exact same pain. It was psychosomatic. It was my body reminding me of the damage alcohol does and it really made me never want to go there again.
And the moment I stopped thinking about drinking, it went away.
Ok, this is cool. As I was writing the previous line, I thought about drinking for a moment and for a fraction of a second, a mild hangover headache hit me. And it just feels like it was my body telling me "No" again. Pretty cool.
Anyway, time to start the day. Talk later!