Lbs

Hello
I am opiate addict, and have been for almost ten years, with a lot of breaks but none very long. I am so sad about how much time and money I have waisted, but know that I have to stay positive and live for today. I just have tried so many times to stop and feel like I might never succeed.

Today is day 3 of no pills and I feel ok. On my heaviest days I would take 7-8 roxie's or 4-5 OP 80's. I am using subs to get me through these first days, and am wondering if I should stay on them longer, since I never seem to last that long. I have access to them because my friend is in a program and gets more than she needs. I am scared to become addicted to them, because I have heard the withdraw is even worse.

I know that I want it this time.. I blocked all the numbers that I had to score and deleted them. This a huge step for me.. I of course know I could score if I really wanted to, but at least it's not as easy as just picking up the phone.

I really want to find someone to talk to that has been off pills for a long time, someone to show me it can be done.. It seems like everyone I know always relapse's as do I and I am looking for some inspiration.

Thanks