Originally Posted by
knb02 
I am trying. I really am but I feel like getting drunk too. Sigh. .There's alot of good. More good than bad. The best 36 days of my life in a long time. But it doesn't stop life from being challenging and it hasn't stopped me from feeling lonely. I dont understand why I dont t have a boyfriend. I dont understand why I am not married I deserve to he married. Even the alcoholics in the AA meetings are frigging married. Why am I not married?!!!!!!!
I'm going to be blunt because I needed to realise this too.
Because you're in the middle of a torrid love affair with booze. There's been no room for anyone else.
An abusive relationship can be just as difficult to leave as any other.
I gave 20 years of my life to drinking - I needed to give a decent amount of time to my recovery before I dismissed it as not working.
I'm working my way from the back of the thread - I don't know what you decided ultimately yet but I'll leave these posts here cos I think it's part of an important discussion for everyone.
Life is hard without drinking...if you're like me you drank away every stress and every bad emotion (or tried to, at least)...
learning to deal with that stuff is hard - it's uncomfortable - but it does get easier.
If you never push through you'll never find that out knb - and that would be tragic.
D