Then that last day I had no control.
Not even sure how my "plan" would of stopped me that day.. I sort of robotically headed for the store against every part of my brain that said don't.
Grendhar,
it's very cool indeed that you can admit you had no control before the first drink.
it's invaluable knowledge.
it can help you short-circuit excuses, denials, fudgings, narratives of "oh i decided it would be okay...."
i haven't read your previous posts, so don't know what you'd been doing in the first week.
but from hearing you talk about your free- advice-dispensary, i imagine you thought you had control and this now has sideswiped that idea.
took me a long time to see that my own experience contradicted my preferred thinking and convictions.
but once i saw it, there was no going back.
you speak of getting those days back, and more.
well, you can't. you can't. those days are gone.
but you can get others.
others that don't end up in drinking again.
entirely doable.