Don't confuse abstinence for control Kin. They're two very separate things.
You seem a bit stuck at the moment. 6 months is great but it can a little too soon for the full benefits of recovery top materialise and yet long enough for us to forget the bad stuff...
sometimes it can get a little like the mouse hypnotized by the snake waiting to pounce.
You have the power to change this - you're not a hapless mousy victim at the whim of your snakey AV.
Maybe beef up your recovery plan a little? more changes? more support?
Fight back
D