Thanks for very swift responses. I havent joined any formal programs but I do think in my heart that I am better off teetotal. I suppose I just need daily reminding. My husband is the best and very forgiving. We had so many good years on the booze together... its a bitter pill to swallow admitting that it is something I have lost control over. An alcohol free life would be so damn good for me though and he would be so proud of me.