You've been through a lot and no wonder you're a mix of emotions and resentment. Your father obviously has good intentions but doesn't know how to be a father who parents well. So give him some points for trying to save you. You know his faults and omissions and you have every reason to be angry but can you look at him now as at least trying to make up for the past, however misguidedly.
Concentrate on your own mental health and recovery now. You might benefit from learning to set boundaries and be assertive ( a counsellor should be able to refer you). Find support for your recovery that is separate from your father and that you're comfortable with. Once you and your father achieve some balance in your relationship you might find you become close to him at an adult to adult level.