Hi guys. Continues to be difficult over here. Depression, obviously, and I'm stressed at work because they are preparing to cut my assistant again like they did last year, and I feel like I'm right back where I was when I relapsed. I'm trying to take care of myself and make the right decisions this time, so I asked my doctor to write me out of work for a few days next week so I can focus on my recovery and come up with a plan for coping with the stress. I hate to lose time from work when I'm already so overwhelmed, and I'm feeling very guilty about it, but I realize I really need to take a step back and come up with a plan to protect my recovery right now. I'm working on accepting my limitations and reprioritizing to put my health and sobriety above work. This feels half like success and half like failure, but I'm basically just doing exactly what I would tell a friend to do. I'm disappointed in myself for being "weak," but I'm aware that it's possible to reframe this to be positive, and I'm working on that.
Just like you guys are saying - be sober for you. It really just comes down to taking care of yourself so you can live a better life. So simple but so hard sometimes. You all inspire me.
Mark - that sucks, we've had our credit card reissued like four times in the past year for that reason (including the Home Depot and Target ones). So irritating, and it's nearly impossible for them to catch people who do it.
No ice cream necessary for me, still digging my chocolate chia seed pudding.