khendal46

When I was eleven, I was put into foster care with my sister. My dad was in a 90 day rehab and my mom had schizophrenia and refused to work so we would have starved to death if my dad didn't call DCF. He basically gave us away because he couldn't get sober, and leave my mother and go take care of us. The next eight years of my life were hell. I went from my grandmas house, where i was kicked out, to a friend of my sister's house, whose family kicked us out, and finally me and my sister were out with this disabled woman who basically used us as slaves to clean her house. I won't go into detail, but we knew that we were not really wanted, and were only valued for our housework the entire time we lived there. My sister moved out at 18, and I was able to get put in my sisters custody when I was 16. The whole time when this was going on, my dad was drinking, constantly making promises about how we would be moving in with him, and then letting us down. My dad finally got sober three years ago, when I was seventeen and living with my sister.
Flash forward two years, I also have a substance abuse problem. It seriously damaged mine and my sisters relationship, and I had to go live with my schizophrenic mom for a while. The whole time this happened my dad would say things like "if you can't find anywhere to go, you can stay with me is my studio apartment" half jokingly. Finally things got so bad around there with my mom, and I wound up with two dui's. At this same time, my dad got his inheritance from his mom, several hundred thousand. He has now moved me in to the apartment next to him, and is making me go to AA. He completely controls every aspect of my life, and has made comments that he would kick me out if I stopped going to AA. He is a very insecure, anxiety-ridden yet self-righteous man who has no other close family or friends other than me and my sister. i relapsed a couple months ago, and I remember him telling me that I "disgusted him" and making me walk to work and things like that.
I finally got fed up with this whole thing when we were at a meeting together and he said, semi-jokingly, that he "can't wait to hear the ninth step amends I make to him", and looked at me. I guess he thought this was funny because a lot of people know about my dui's and how he got me a lawyer and takes care of me. That irritated me. Then finally, the other day he was talking about my sister, who lives with her boyfriend and drinks pretty heavily. Her boyfriend is leaving town for a couple weeks, and my dad said he worries about how much she will drink and party without him there. He then said "maybe I should move her in the apartment next to you so i can keep an eye on her". This didn't strike me as funny. Since I have been living with my dad, I don't even go out. I know if I started going on dates and doing things with friends it would cause a fight, because he says that's not a good idea since I might be tempted to drink or do drugs this early in sobriety. I basically keep him company all the time. I pay all my own bills except for rent, my college and health care are state-funded since I was in foster care. My dad mentions things semi-frequently about how much money he has paid for my lawyer, and how he pays for my rent and stuff like that. I just feel like yeah, he has finally stepped in to help, but he has gotten off soooo easy. Me and my sister have a relationship with him, and we spend the holidays and things with him. My life basically revolves around him and AA. And he is fine with it. I jam just very resentful towards him at this point. Now that he has stepped in to be the father he never was, using his inheritance money, he has decided he wants to run my life and tell me that I have to get sober at twenty years old or risk him kicking me out. Does it sound like my anger is justified or am I just being greedy and entitled? I would like to hear an outsiders perspective. thanks for reading!