FO - you're post reminded me of this quote;
“Chronic remorse, as all the moralists are agreed, is a most undesirable sentiment. If you have behaved badly, repent, make what amends you can and address yourself to the task of behaving better next time. On no account brood over your wrongdoing. Rolling in the muck is not the best way of getting clean.”
Alex Haley
Brave New World
I try not to drive down the street looking in the rearview mirror - totally agree when we get sober it's like slamming the brakes on and all the "crap in the back seat" comes flying forward.
I clean up the wreckage best I can, try not repeat and move on. When more is revealed, I make amends where possible.......
Jazz I did;
Not enough for many
Too much for some
Whatever impulsive gratification I could could find