Originally Posted by cynical one

For me- forgiving myself, apologizing to myself, and making amends to myself was by far the very hardest part of my recovery.

Some are thinking ‘what do I have to apologize to myself for, I didn’t hurt me, he/she/they did'.

*I* abandoned myself. *I* compromised myself, my values, my morals, my mental/emotional/physical/financial well-being. *I* allowed myself to be treated horribly. *I* lost confidence in myself. *I* put myself in situations, around people places, and things where I should have never been. *I* didn’t trust my own judgement and instincts. *I* looked for outside validation instead of relying on my own. *I* believed others words over what *my* eyes saw. *I* didn’t nurture the (freaking amazing) woman that I am. *I* didn’t take care of the life that my HP (God) gifted to me.

*I* did all of that to myself, nobody else did.

After months of recovery, I went back to where it all began. I hit my knees and let that little inner child bawl like a baby and I forgave, and I sincerely apologized, and I made a vow to myself to learn from it and never repeat. And, from that night forward I started making amends…to myself.