Susie-I do know how you feel-at times. A great friend and I prayed together last night about some things she's dealing with and struggling with and she prayed for me as well-she told me how amazing I am and I knocked it down-she prayed my exs abusive words abd tearing me down-all of it-would disappear-that God would take those memories and do away with them-bc every so often I have to catch myself when I think those things-but now, after going through all of this, and breaking away from my abuser, I assign names to those thoughts and literally say, "shut the f**k up, (ex husbands name)....i am loved, I am forgiven, I am strong, I am important, I am smart and I'm a child of God. Thank God I am not you! Leave me alone!!!!!". Literally, that's my internal dialogue when my exs words pop into my head. Maybe that will help you
You are amazing-don't forget that. Hugs and peace to you