You have 2000 miles and an Order that won't allow visitation at this time so I don't see eminent threat here. I agree with you that there is no telling what the Ex has told her as far as why he has no contact with his Son, I'm sure its along the lines of it being your fault.
Since it appears she is the one who is marching toward a reconciliation and not you Ex (at least that's what it appears to me), I think I would ignore it for now. My first inclination is to send her all the paperwork showing why there is no relationship; however, that could also result in her pushing Ex to do what the Courts ask and move toward reconciliation. Ex knows what he has to do and has not done it so if she pushed him too and he did I don't see that it would be authentic or beneficial for your child.
If it continues then I would most likely contact Ex, remind him of why things are the way they are, and politely request she stop. Stay on your side of the street. I suspect if bells ring that you "might" forward transcripts and Orders to her it would come to a screeching halt.
I am sorry for this woman and the Codie in me, hell the human in me, wants her to know what she has hooked up with. I don't see that will benefit you, in fact it could blow up on you. She probably has already seen the cracks and is dismissing them. That's on her.