Yes, Walk, I meant "rationally explain irrational behavior."
There may be foundational reasons but being asked to explain? Everything comes up as an irrational excuse/reason. Which can be useful but often isn't. Unless I guess, I was able to get real and express it adequately, "Because it all hurts too much and I am emotionally unable to handle any of it and what do you expect me to do when I can't even put it into words to help you to understand?"