I don't drink as much as the friends I meet drinking, I must not have a problem if they don't. Just one more, yeah that will do it...
I think with any addiction we try to rationalize and minimize it to the point it makes sense in our diluted minds. I know when I first started drinking it made me feel as if a weight had been lifted and turned me from an introvert to a social extrovert. The shyness, inhibition, etc where simply lifted and I was under the guise of the intoxicated self was the true me. As in adding alcohol completed me, made me a whole person. I realize now it also changed my perception of myself which was a skewed version of how I thought it was. I think looking back and actually lifting those rose colored glasses of good fun and including the down afterwards it wasn't as peachy. It's our AV that is telling us what great fun it was, when in reality it might have been after the first few, but as an alcoholic a few didn't cut it for long. We craved more and it moved into the front spot of thought process, and controlled us. It became our higher power...