I opened up a can of worms by drinking the other night.
The AV came back tonight and was like see, it wasn't that bad? You're irritated from work right now, you know what to do. No one will know.
It took alot to get my car to go home without buying anything.
I forgot about that part when I drank. And now I have to squash the little bugger all over again.
Please give me the strength to learn from my mistake, to keep the memory fresh of how awful I felt drinking and the next day, to keep me humble, to learn, to do anything anything I can to keep moving forward, please let me strive for stability and peace, glimpses of which I fought so hard for and were so precious. Amen.
Once I got in my house I felt a little weird for a few minutes but now I am just filled with a sense of relief. I escaped the monster.
I didn't consider any of this when I wanted to drink. I thought of the hangover but I talked myself past it. I forgot about waking the monster.
xoxo